Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t buy bullshit

I have complete contempt for fakery

If everyone in Russia dropped into holes in the ground only never to return, would that be good for NATO and international peacekeepers? Can we convince Russians to be less diabolical, so they coexist? Does Putin stink like doo doo in the commode?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I actually pay taxes

Can you show pictures of your penis, big or small?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

You guys are talking about having sex with dogs. I heard a news man was trying to have sex with a female dog and got stuck inside. Is that possible? How does it feel inside a dog’s vagina?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

How do I develop the patience to read books?

I have a reading level above third grade

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Kevin Durant Reportedly Would've Put Knicks on Top Landing Spots If NY Pursued Trade - Bleacher Report

I don’t cotton to rapists

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Have you ever had sex with your mother-in-law? If so, how was it and did your wife ever find out?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I see through liars

Why am I always so tired and I don't eat enough?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Thinking from a spiritual perspective, can we say that the journey in recovering from narcissistic abuse a battle of spiritual warfare? Any thoughts on this?

I can read

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Why didn't Taylor Swift do Taylor Swift (Taylors version)?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

What is the moral stance on lying? Can you provide examples of when it is appropriate or inappropriate to lie? Does the Bible address this issue?

I can count

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Why does TikTok allow porn stars in its platform? Isn't it aimed at teenagers?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

What are some sex stories from your college days?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Trump is shot, tackled by SS agents, yet then stands, defiant, with fist high, and 52 hours later, walks into the Republican Convention to thunderous applause. Is there anything that can stop this man, who loves his country? Does he get your vote?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I understand how hurricane paths work

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.